A recent issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association stated what two other studies have demonstrated before, namely that being fat is not as bad as it is supposed to be. That if you are in the "Overweight" category you may actually have a longer life expectancy than those who are of so-called normal weight. Immediately there was an outcry from those who probably meant well but plainly didn't know any better, who voiced concern that when (fat) people were given this new information, they would eat everything in sight. (Doesn't their concern make you feel all gooshey inside?)

However, one of the JAMA study's authors stood out as a voice of reason. She essentially said that despite this "new" information you should still eat right and exercise. It was almost a Health At Every Size (HAES) answer. Yes, obesity is not the life threatening illness we think it is and being pudgy is actually healthier than being thin. I know people won't be running out and eating entire cheesecake to celebrate that's okay to be fat. What I want people to do is learn how to eat normally again. I want kids to be able have cupcake parties at school (while growing up when we had cupcakes in school--it was one per customer, not 50 per customer--and I don't think it's changed much) and I want people to be okay with occasionally overeating (no matter what your size). Especially with the holidays coming up. Be honest, what good is Thanksgiving if we don't pass out next to dad after dinner.

This is my favorite time of year. I love the fall: great weather, fun holidays, family, prezzies and good food. Few people start diets at this time of year. I actually always did because I didn't want to gain too much weight over the fall. I became obsessed with the food I ate over the holidays: not too much candy, seconds were okay on Thanksgiving if I had lots of salad beforehand.

But between all the self-discipline tricks I used, I forgot the reason why I celebrate fall. I love the weather; the cool crisp air is refreshing after a hot summer. I love walking and looking at the leaves change. I get to snuggle up to my husband who I call my "heat rock." I spend time with family and friends. Why should I waste my time keeping track of everything that comes into my mouth? The worst part is the more I tried to control my life the less control I had over my eating. Usually I would be perfect for Thanksgiving: salad, turkey, a serving of stuffing, lots of green beans. That would be it. I wouldn't have that second serving of stuffing, no matter how much it was talking to me, drowning out my head and all the conversations around me. "Lara, Lara," it would yell. "Don't you want another serving of stuffing?" "No" I told it. "You have too many carbs and fats." "But I am lightly salted, not too mushy. Please, please, pleeeeeease have some more."

We'd argue over it for a while, me completely missing anything else going on. But by the end of the evening I would end up being victorious over the stuffing.

Until the next day. Then I would go straight to the fridge and shovel down whatever was left over of the stuffing, 3,4,5, servings, it didn't matter. I denied myself and my body fought back. Now that I've stopped dieting this has stopped being an issue. If I want a second helping, I have a second helping. Because then I am satisfied. I can enjoy the conversation of the people around me because I am no longer thinking about food.

The moral of this story is: it is okay to be fat, it is ok to have seconds. Science says so.

Lara Frater